An Unplanned Plan

I am a big, big, BIG planner. I like to plan things, and I have just about everything planned. I think that both my incessant need to be organized and my OCD tendencies play a role in this. I plan more than I ought/need to, but I can’t help myself. I plan my weeks, my days, my mornings, my runs, my meals, and this, and that, and those. It’s ridiculous, really, but I do it.

Last summer I began getting to know God a bit better. I started taking small steps to try and live my life in line with what he wanted for me. I quickly began to realize that planning my every moment wasn’t exactly how God wanted me to live. I was learning that God plans, not me, and the only plan I need to have is this: to follow his guidance, ultimately following HIS plan.

You see, I used to have my future completely mapped out. I knew exactly when I was going to finish school, exactly what I was going to do afterward, and exactly where I was going to live; I knew every step I was going to take and I allowed no room for any adjustments. My plans seemed perfectly set, and I was happy with the map I had laid out for myself, but God had a different plan. He had a different idea of where he wanted me.

As I began taking steps with God last summer, I also began to let go of some of my plans. God took my hand and guided me on a path that I had never even seen. My life a year ago is almost unrecognizable to me now.  God changed my heart and my life, but he also changed the outline of my life I had written.

God scrapped nearly all of my previously thought-out, mapped out, meticulously planned out future, and the only piece of guidance he has given me so far is this: follow me.

Honestly, there have been times that I have absolutely no idea what to do with that. I mean, I’d like a little insight into where I’m headed.

“Sure God, I’ll follow you, but could you tell me where I’m going?”

Imagine yourself driving a car. You’ve got a passenger in the front seat that is taking you to a certain destination, but they have yet to tell you where. They are completely reliable, but they refuse to tell you where you are headed, and sometimes following their directions is tricky. You’re afraid you might not hear them as they whisper, or you might not see them when they gesture where to turn. If they would only tell you where you are going then you could ensure that you will arrive there, but they won’t say.  

This has been my situation for almost a year, and it’s scary! God scrapped my plans for my life, and he has yet to disclose his plans. I feel as if I am blindly walking, idling, coasting my way through life without a destination. I don’t know if I am even on a path. If I am, I don’t know that it’s the right one, nor where it will lead. It’s frightening and it’s stressful. It’s discouraging when people ask me what I am going to do after school and I say, “I don’t know. God hasn’t told me yet.” I am a planner without a plan.

But God has indeed brought me comfort in a number of ways, and he has given me renewed confidence in my blind walk.

First, I have been assured that my steps are guided and my future is planned by God, my ever-loving Father, and I can entrust my life into his hands.

“I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you.” Psalm 32:8

“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

I have the high and mighty king planning my future and guiding my steps. How can I possibly be uncertain or afraid of where I am going if God has promised to take me and guide me there?

Second, I have been reminded that my purpose is to glorify my God. Sometimes it’s easy to feel as if I have no purpose because I have no direction or destination, but I’ve learned that is never true. Regardless of the career, house, or relationship where I find myself in the future, my purpose is to glorify the king.

So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. 1 Corinthians 10:31.

I don’t need to know where I am walking to know that I am walking in such a way that gives glory to God. I can praise and worship him in my steps, even if I don’t know exactly where my steps will lead me.

Third, I realized that God doesn’t want me to go crazy trying to plan my future. He wants me to live in the present; to live one day at a time. He instructs me to live in each day, taking on only the worries, troubles, and challenges of that day alone.

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:34

Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. James 4:13-14

As a planner, I struggle without a map, but I’ve learned that I don’t need to have every last detail of my future planned out. No, I don’t know have any idea what God wants me to do. I know my passions and my gifts, but I am clueless as to what He wants me to do with them. No, I don’t have any idea about my future career. I know the category of my education, but I don’t know which specific job that will bring me. No, I don’t have any idea where my footsteps are taking me, but I don’t need to know. Instead, I can walk each day at a time.

I know that each day I should, I can, and I will strive to glorify God. Each day I can walk in His grace and His love. Each day I can take steps to grow spiritually. Each day I can do the things I love, and love others along the way. I don’t know exactly where God is taking me, but I find great comfort in knowing that he is the one taking me there. With God as my guide, I don’t need to fear my unplanned future.

Some days I still become frustrated that I don’t know my destination, but I can also try to understand why I might not know. If the passenger in the car told me where we were to arrive, I would probably redirect and take my own route to get there. While my guide knows the upcoming traffic, the safest paths, and the smoothest rides, I would think that I knew better. I could easily make a wrong turn, hit traffic, or choose the bumpiest road. And maybe that’s not the reasoning behind the hidden destination, but it is teaching me regardless to trust in God and His guidance.

I’ve come to accept that I don’t need to know the specifics of my destination. I don’t need to know the details. What I do know is enough. I know that I have a purpose. I know that I have a destination and direction. I know that God has a plan. God sees where I am going and where he wants me to be. God knows the routes and the directions and God guides my steps. God is my GPS, my guide, and my planner.

I still plan days, mornings, runs, and things that probably don’t need planning, but I am done meticulously planning my future. I am still tempted to fear it or to pull out a notebook and start writing myself a map, but I don’t need to, and it would only take time away from the life I could be living today. Instead, my plan is to not plan. My only plan should be to follow and trust him each day, living one day at a time.

Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails. Proverbs 19:21