Relationship With God: 101

There is no doubt or debate that a relationship with God is different than any kind of human relationship we will encounter. Now, obviously the relationship is different because our relationship with God is not one with a physical person; rather it is one with a spiritual being. However, this is only one of the numerous differences that exist between our relationship with our Savior and the companionship that we have with others.

God’s characteristics play a huge part in this. Because God loves us unconditionally, we do not need to earn His love. He will never love us more, just as He will never love us less. This is not always the case with people. God wholeheartedly forgives us of our shortcomings and He does not hold them against us. God will never leave us, nor betray us. Again, this is not necessarily the case with people.

I could go on and on about how the different attributes of God characterizes what our relationship with Him looks like. However, I think that we already know, and mostly understand, these differences. We know about His love, His unending grace, His mercy, His gentleness, His wisdom, etc.

I believe that it is safe to say that most people who truly know God are aware of the reasons why a relationship with Him is unlike any other. Contrastingly, I am not sure that I believe we understand the ways in which such a partnership is similar to any other. Maybe we do know these “relationship basics,” but I’m not sure that we always adhere to them. I think that we oftentimes lose sight of the essential, yet simple things that build and sustain a relationship.

Just like any relationship, whether it may be friendship, familial, or spousal, there are certain occurrences that should take place on a regular basis. Such protocol keeps relationships strong, close-knit, and healthy.

You should regularly spend quality time together.

I don’t think that we place quite enough importance on spending time with our God.  Just like in any other relationship, God wants us to set aside time wherein we can relax and enjoy His company. Having a coffee or a date with Him may not even cross our minds, but God wants your time just like anyone else. It has been said that distance makes the heart grow fonder, but the last thing we need is to be distant from God! God wants nothing more than to be close to you.

Obviously the ways in which we spend quality time with our Father are different than how we spend it with others, but the importance of spending that time is the same. If you don't think so, try increasing, or at the very least, maintaining, the caliber of a relationship while spending hardly any time together. It doesn’t work. That time together is so necessary. Find an activity that enables you to spend time with your God, and spend it.

You need to communicate on a regular basis.

Communication is so vital on every level in every relatinship. It wasn't long ago that I discovered the immense effects that constantly communicating with God could have on my relationship with Him and on my life. “God is omniscient,” I would think. “He already knows what I’m thinking, what I’m angry about, why I’m upset, the reasons for my happiness … there’s no need to constantly tell Him about it again over and over.” I don’t know, I thought He might get annoyed by the repetition or something. I didn’t realize that I was missing a few key points.

One was this: communication with God is just as much about listening as it is about talking. I wasn’t giving God the opportunity to talk back. How could I let Him guide me, comfort me, or rejoice with me without opening the door for communication? I couldn’t.

The second point I was missing was that, although He may already know my heart, our relationship can't grow if I don’t share my heart with Him. To really understand this point, I relate this idea to one of my best friendships. My best friend Jake and I are unable to see each other often because of the distance between each of our colleges. We hardly see one another and we communicate in order to keep in touch. Now, if Jake did not communicate with me, but I was told by a mutual friend how or what he was doing, would our relationship grow? Would it be sustained? Maybe at first it might, because the friendship that we have already built is so strong. In the long run, however, our friendship would suffer. Even though I am aware of how Jake is doing, our relationship is still hurt due to the lack of communication and kinship between us. I may know about Jake, sure, but the mere knowledge of his situation without mutual conversation does nothing to strengthen our relationship.

By ignoring the need for communication with God, I was not only missing out on the emotional support that He could give me, but I wasn’t allowing us to become any closer or stronger together.

Always let God know that He is appreciated.

God wants to bless you for no reason other than because He loves you. God’s intentions are pure, and He does not favor us for the praise. Does that mean that praises are unnecessary? I certainly don’t think so. I fully believe that we underestimate the power of a small praise. I think that God, like anybody, delights in knowing that we appreciate His actions and His blessings.

I feel like God is similar to a mother who slaves away each night over the stove to cook a delicious meal for her children. She does this because she loves the joy that she sees in them during the meal; she does it purely because she loves them. After months and months of such effort, however, if she lacked any sign of gratification from her children, she may become discouraged and hurt. I don’t know exactly how God feels when we take His blessings for granted, but I can’t imagine it's any better. I don't imagine that He would be opposed to a little recognition and praise.

I think that it is important to acknowledge God’s hand in even the simplest of things. We say that it's, "the little things that mean the most," but sometimes it's the recognition of those little things that mean the most. It is now midway through December, and I have yet to see much snow. I have been craving any sign of the beautiful white flakes, and today I woke up to a lovely snowfall; I made sure to let God know how thankful I was. Simple, yet so important. Were you struck by the beauty of a flower? Did you have a pleasant day at work? Was the weather gorgeous on your day off? Could you feel His peace when you needed it? Did you meet an encouraging stranger who “randomly” crossed your path?  

Whatever it may be, thank God for it! Remind Him that He is appreciated. It could be something as small as a light snow, but a little praise can be a big deal.  

Worship Him.

God knows who He is, and He doesn’t need us to tell Him what that is. God doesn’t need to be reminded of what He’s done for us and He doesn’t need to be reassured of who He is. So why is worship necessary? Similar to the idea that communication with God is just as much for us as it is for Him, I believe that worship has the same concept.

Worship is for our heart just as much as it is for His.

I do think that God finds pleasure in hearing us rejoice but, more importantly, He deserves it. God deserves nothing less than to be praised, glorified, and lifted up.  I think that worship is vital because it reminds us of that fact. Worship reminds us of the pain our Savior endured, the sins He bore, and the cross that He carried. It reminds us of His power, glory, and wisdom. It tells us of His love and grace towards His children.

One of my favorite worship songs is a perfect example of how worship reminds us who our Lord is and what He can do. I think that the bridge of the song is the most powerful, and it goes like this:

“All our troubles and all our fears, God our hope, He has overcome. All our failure and all our fear, God our love, He has overcome. All our heartache and all our pain, God our healer, He has overcome. All our burdens and all our shame, God our freedom, He has overcome … God our justice, God our grace, God our freedom, He has overcome. God our refuge, God our strength, God is with us. He has overcome.”

David speaks about our Lord in Psalm 18, the Lord who is His strength, his rock, his fortress and deliverer. His rock in whom he takes refuge, his shield, the horn of his salvation, and his stronghold.

Worship writes on our hearts the wonders of His love, the amazing works that He has done, and the number of things that God can be, will be, and is for us; our hope, strength, love, freedom, refuge, grace, and our justice.

Christian author Joni Eareckson Tada said, “The Christian faith is meant to be lived moment by moment. It isn’t some broad, general outline- it’s a long walk with a real person. Details count: passing thoughts, small sacrifices, a few encouraging words, little acts of kindness, and brief victories over nagging sins.”

I think that she worded it perfectly; the Christian faith is about our walk with our savior, and the little details matter just as they do in any other relationship. I think that sometimes we not only forget the simple things we need to do to strengthen our heart and our walk, but we forget the importance of these simple things; we lose sight of how vital they are to its strength and growth. It’s no question that the relationship we have with our Savior is different than any other, but we mustn’t forget the areas wherein those relationships are the same.

Spend time with your God. Love Him, praise Him, and talk with Him. Tell Him about your day. Thank Him for the snow. Sing to Him of His greatness. Don’t let your relationship with Him become distant or stagnant, because being in love and close with your God will result in the most amazing relationship you’ll ever have.

Our relationship with God is undoubtedly unique and it is magnificently different than any other, but it is a relationship nonetheless, and all relationships require certain basics of time, communication, appreciation, and praise. If these are necessary in our earthly relationships, shouldn't they be exponentially more important in our spiritual relationship with our Savior and our God?